Wits End Drama

So in my building there are 12 apartments total.  The opposite end has some kids.  Two families & the little kids play together, around the whole building, in the lots, whatever.  None of us mind, except there is never any adult supervision.

Now, those of us at the opposite end have talked about that there is never any adult supervision.  Ever.  The oldest girl, who is probably about 9 years old has to watch her little sister who is probably 5ish and her little brother who is 2.  He has a motorized 4 wheeler he rides around.  He's been on the street with it.  My neighbor, Jen, has said several times to the oldest little girl "where's your mom?", "watch your little brother".  I mean, these kids think nothing of saying hi to us or talking to us.  It concerns me with the odd balls that live in this general neighborhood, not just my building.

Now, the mother has a "husband".  We are going to classify "husband" loosely.  We all feel terrible for the oldest little girl, the one who is always in charge.  She's always dragging the garbage out.  Always watching those kids.  She misses the school bus quite often.  It's just not a good deal.  Her dad is not the same dad as the other 2 younger kids.  Last year, the oldest girl mentioned how her mom married the smaller kids father.

On Sunday, Jen saw most of the kids in the back (there are 2 other kids but they live in a different apartment & don't pertain to this story) except the little 2 year old boy was out front talking with the Conspiracy Theorist.  WTF??  So when Jen was walking her dog, she saw the oldest little girl & asked why her mom never comes outside with them & that the little boy was talking to the Conspiracy Theorist.  I guess the oldest girl made a face, like Jen was on to something.  Poor little girl can't even be a little girl.  Jen doesn't remember if she said anything else to the little girl.  I mean neither one of those adults is ever outside sitting on the stoop watching these kids.  What the fuck is wrong with them?

On Monday Jen had a note on her door telling her to mind her business & that the mom is a "single, working mom".  Bull fucking shit.  She's a lazy piece of garbage who is totally fucking up her kids, especially the oldest girl.  Jen said the kids haven't been playing down this way.  It's not like any of us mind.  They like to pet the dogs when we all walk them & they chit chat with us.  I mean, they are little kids.  LITTLE KIDS.  It's just a bad deal & that woman, those people are fucked up.  If something happens to that little boy, that little girl would be messed up more than she probably already is.

Fruity Nutcake - The Psychotic Edition

Ok, so remember on April 29, 2011 when I wrote my Fruity Nutcake blog?  Two days ago, since today is only May 1, 2011??  Well, the one of two things happened.  There was confrontation.  Bad.  Screaming.  My Screaming.  I had to call my neighbor to come over.  Bad. 

I got home from being at Jay's & having dinner & there was this woman leaving out the shared door.  My Sherlock Holmes deduction told me that since I didn't know her, she was leaving from Fruity Nutcake's apartment.  She walked by me, humming and as I put my key in my door this is the conversation that took place:

Lady: Are you the young lady that lives upstairs?
Me: Yes.
Lady: Can I talk to you?
Me: Today isn't a good day.
Lady: Can I talk to you?
Me: Today isn't a good day.
Lady: Can I talk to you?
Me: (walking down off my stoop, hand up) Today isn't a good day.
Lady: Well, I will pray for you.
Me: Pray for me? Seriously? Pray for me?  I don't need to be prayed for.
Lady: Do you think you can keep the noise down in your apartment?
Me: What? Seriously, do you think I make noise 24/7??? 
Lady: Can I talk with you about Fruity Nutcake?  She's not well, she's sick.
Me: Really? I never would have guessed that and how is that my problem?
Lady: She isn't well.  She has a sweet boy, he's autistic.  Do you know what autism is?
Me: Yes, I'm fully aware of what autism is.
Lady: Well, it's just so hard & the noise....
Me: Again, how is that my problem?  We live in garden apartments & she lives on the first floor.  (Me now screaming) I worry about getting up to go pee in the middle of the night because she claims I'm up all the time making noise. 
Lady: Garden apartment, what does that mean, is your apartment a little more special?
Me: No, it means we share a common lawn space.  She's in a garden apartment in a dog building.  There is going to be noise. (I'm shaking & screaming).  There were wood floors when I moved in, not my problem.
Lady: Do you think you could get a rug? (Fruity Nutcake opens the door).
Me: Have one.  If you think I am going to walk on egg shells in MY apartment you are insane.  The fact that she banged on the ceiling the other night because I got up to pee is absurd.  I hesitate to get up to pee in the middle of the night for fear she is going to bang.  I refuse to live like a prisoner in my apartment.  It's not going to happen.
Lady: That was my idea to bang.
Me: Yeah, great idea.

So I walk to my stoop & the following happens with Fruity Nutcake, oh and don't forget I'm screaming & crying:

Fruity Nutcake: Can my friend come in while you walk up in your apartment?
Me: No, I get there is noise, the management office isn't going to rip up floors to fix it, fucking deal with it.
Fruity Nutcake: I'm a light sleeper, I sleep right there (points to couch).
Me: I don't give a fuck, not my problem.  Buy a box fan or white noise machine.  This is the deal, get over yourself.
Fruity Nutcake: I'm moving to a new place.
Me: I can't wait.
Fruity Nutcake: I like you, I don't want to fight.
Me: Bull fucking shit.  You are in the office almost every day crying over the noise.  Grow up. ( I call my neighbor to come over, because I am double teamed).
Fruity Nutcake: I was only there once (LIE).
Me: I will not be living like a prisoner in my apartment.  It's not going to happen.  Suck it up & deal with it.  I fucking sit on my couch & crochet.  Is my crocheting bothering you?  Do I fucking crochet too loud??  Really?? Shut your door, just shut your door.

I'm surprised the police didn't show up.  With my use of the F word & my hysterical screaming & crying.  I have a feeling they may show up in the middle of the night.  My neighbor Jen suggested the police be called with excessive noise.  So I'm sure when I get up to pee, she will be calling.  Of course Jen did ask how she knows about the noise if she sleeps in her car hahaha!

I did call the office & leave a message briefly explaining what happened & that I will be over first thing tomorrow to have it dealt with.  This is absolutely absurd.  I just can't believe some people.

When I walked Hailey at a little after 10, some of the lovely tenants at her new building were sitting out side screaming & cussing & having a grand time.  I can't wait until she gets over there. 

Fruity Nutcake

Yes, this is what I have decided to call my neighbor down below, who is only going to be my neighbor for 5 more weeks.  The management office is moving her to the building across the street....the one with bush pukers & those who get their supply of "materials" from the Conspiracy Theorist. 

The boy (cat) is still waking me up extremely early in the morning.  Obviously my talks are not working with him.  On Tuesday, at 4am, he had me up.  So I got up, shut Hailey in my bedroom, went to the bathroom, didn't flush my toilet, walked to my kitchen, gave the boy treats, got some for Hailey & walked back to my room.  Fruity Nutcake decided to bang on the ceiling.  WTF, really asshole???? REALLY?!?!?!?!

I was fired up.  I got up & got ready at 6am, my heart was racing & my anxiety was off the charts.  I waited for the management office to open up.  At about 9am, I went to talk with Patti.  I told her I never planned to come over to talk to her about the lady downstairs but it's getting out of control.  I told her I was now concerned about getting up just to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.  I explained exactly what happened to Patti during the night.

Fruity Nutcake is a bully & so full of shit.  What a fake ass broke down bitch.  She told Patti I do nothing but stomp & clomp 24/7.  It's so bad she can't use her living room & she's had to sleep in her car sometimes.  Really?  I thought it was your son that was bothered??  Sometimes she even sleeps in the bedroom closet. 

Patti said she's over there crying just about everyday.  I asked Patti if she ever lived in a garden style apartment before & apparently she hasn't.  I told Patti that I think there is something that is/has upset Fruity Nutcake & she's taking it out this way.  Patti was like: "You know her son is autistic, right?  That's been hard for her".  I told Patti I didn't think that was it.  I'm not dismissing that her son has an issue, nor is it the issue in this instance.  I told Patti that she needs to inform her that this is real life & that Fruity Nutcake needs to put her big girl panties on.  I refuse to live on edge in my apartment.  I mean, I've been crocheting every night, seriously, how much effing noise does that make?????

I talked with Patti for a bit, she said she would speak to her about the banging.  I told Patti if I have to go down in the middle of the night to discuss it with her, it wouldn't go well at all.  Finally, before I left, Patti showed me all the gifts Fruity Nutcake has brought over to her & to Dara, the other office girl.  That's right.  Fake tears & bribe gifts.  I also informed Patti that her "claim" of not being able to use her living room is crap, her TV has been on every night, I see it on when I walk Hailey for the last time at night.

Now, I know I called her a bully.  That came to light yesterday.  I went to drop off my rent & had to put in a couple of work orders for things in my apartment.  Patti told me that after I left on Tuesday, I hadn't even pulled out of my parking place & she saw Fruity Nutcake driving by & she noticed me at the office.  She was gawking as she drove by.  Yesterday Patti told me she hasn't been back since to complain, so she hasn't had an opportunity to talk with her about banging in the middle of the night.  That's how I know she's a bully.  First of all, she doesn't even know why I was at the office, whether I was discussing her or not.  She assumed, obviously she assumed right.  I don't know who Fruity Nutcake thought she was dealing with. 

Patti told me they never even intended on coming to talk to me about the noise.  My maintenance guy Gary told Patti exactly what I was like.  So she's moving to a new building, 2nd floor apartment.  Good for her.  That building is worse.  I told Patti her complaints won't stop.  But she has 5 weeks to left here.  She's been very quiet too.  But I haven't.  Not if, according to her I am making all sorts of crazy noise.  So when I walk Hailey, I slam my door, but not at 10pm.  I have held back on playing with Hailey & her ball, during the day, but I've let her have it. She squeaks it & chases it.  Hailey doesn't understand why she can't play with her toy, she just knows she can't. 

I imagine one of two things will happen.  The next few weeks will be quiet or there is going to be a huge blow up.  If there is a blow up, don't worry, I will share it with you!!

Conversations

Before I get to my actual blog, I have to mention a couple of things.

First: Someone, somewhere (Facebook (FB), I think) reported my blog as being abusive. I couldn't post it to my wall, FB notified me as I was trying to post. I emailed them immediately explaining I've never had a problem & had to wait. So I shut the blog down from anyone trying to read it, until I either figured out who reported me or FB restored my ability. That lasted a whole 24 hours, as my ability to post to FB was restored, which is good because I have something to share with you.

Second: Please know that I would never ever make fun of anyone with a disability. That's just not funny. It's not going to happen here. I will however, point out if someone is an asshole or is funny. That stuff just makes for a better read.

OK, blog time....

As I have mentioned, my street name is Wits End. It's not a joke. I moved here when I was getting divorced. It's the only place I could find that would allow me to have a dog. So the building I live in is a dog building. 95% of us here have 1 or more dogs. I am not sure if I mentioned but the Rock star with the asshole dogs moved about. Apparently he was a disgusting pig. There was poo in the bathroom baseboard heater. I don't know how it got there nor do I want to know. I met the new woman who lives below me when she was moving in. She explained it was going to be her & her son who is 23. Mind you, we have 1 bedroom apartments. He will get the bedroom & she will be sleeping on a pull out in the living room. Her son is autistic that is why he is still with her. I apologized in advance for Hailey & her hopping around, she behaves like a mule deer & sometimes sounds like a horse. They've been here about a week.

While on my blog shut down, she opened the door to talk to me yesterday morning. The conversation went something like this:

New Neighbor (NN): I wanted to ask you if you could keep the noise down at 4am. The floor really squeaks a lot & it wakes us up & when my son gets woken up he gets agitated & then can't go back to sleep. I've been sleeping in his closet.
Me: So sorry. I don't know why they (the cat & dog) have been getting up at 4am. I don't want to be up then & I have been trying to fix that problem.
NN: well the floors squeak, & it's just very noisy & I've been sleeping in the closet.
Me: Well, I've had conversations with the cat & dog explaining that I don't want to be up then & they don't need to be either & we should try sleeping until 6am.
NN: Could you try again?
Me: Sure, I will try & explain & rationalize to a cat & dog why they shouldn't be up at 4am.
NN: Ok thanks, sorry sweetheart, I'm not trying to be a pain.
Me: Sure, I will go talk to them now.

Yes. That was my conversation. I looked her straight in the eye & said I would talk to Hailey & the boy & explain that they shouldn't get up or be so noisy. And I did just that. All day, I mentioned it to them.

And really, sleeping in the closet?? Come on now. If I get up & feed them, it's a matter of 10 minutes. Not really worthy of sleeping in the closet. Seriously.

When it was bedtime, I propped my door shut just enough that the cat could get in & out, but Hailey was forced to stay with me. Hailey is a good sleeper with a couple of exceptions: when her pill makes her sick to her stomach & when there is a thunder storm. The boy, on the other hand, is a real pain. He is very smart & does things, scratches the metal cover where the air conditioner would go, because it's loud. He sits on the bed & meows at Hailey to wake her up. He runs like a wildebeest from the living room to the bedroom & across the bed & whoever is sleeping. He is the problem. I have tried breaking up their meals into 4 small ones instead of 2 big ones. Extra treats. Ignoring them. Nothing works. I don't know what to do.

Last night, he started at 4am. Hailey was forced to stay in the bedroom & pace instead of being able to get out into the living room with the hardwood floors. Here I am telling him to cut the shit & telling Hailey to get back in her bed. Around 5am, an hour of this, I had to go to the bathroom. While trying to be sympathetic to her request, I was slightly annoyed & felt like a prisoner in my bedroom. Plus, I really had to go. So I turned my light on, which instantly causes Hailey to jump up out of her bed. I sneak out of the bedroom, keeping her locked in, go to the bathroom, go to the kitchen quick, give the cat some treats & grab some for Hailey. When I get back in the bedroom, I prop the door again & give Hailey her snack. By the time I turned my light back off, Hailey was already sound asleep & snoring in her bed. Not another peep out of the boy either. I was awake until about 6am, I started to doze & at about 7am I got up to feed the first portion of breakfast. Then we all went back to bed, but I didn't really sleep.

They aren't home right now. I don't know if she is going to complain to me any more. I hope not. I really don't want to be up at 4am or wake my neighbors up. Before she even moved in I have been trying to find a solution to this problem.

Also, I don't know why she chose this apartment complex. I know of a place where she could get a 2 bedroom apartment much cheaper than what she is paying here & they don't allow dogs there. As I mentioned, she did move into a dog building. While I will make efforts to keep the middle of the night noise down, it may not always be perfect. When it isn't perfect she will need to suck it up sometimes. I may seem bitchy & it could be because I'm tired & being up in the middle of the night AND becoming frustrated will make anyone bitchy.

If anyone has tips on how to help me with this, I would appreciate them. Please don't suggest I lock them out of the bedroom. The cat will beat the door until I let him in. I keep Hailey close because sometimes during the night she has panicky itchy fits & get up to keep her calm. I also feed them their final meal just before lights out. So if you have something different to suggest, please share.

Agitated

I woke up in the midst of a very awful dream this morning. I was so upset. Then, when I turned on the TV a song came on that seemed to confirm my dream. Terrible. I got even more upset. Then I get a text message from someone at work that said "I'm bored". I responded "I've been bored for 8 months". Really? Someone WHO HAS A JOB is going to text me saying they're bored? This happens frequently. I get "I'm bored", "I need a day off", "I wish I didn't have to work". I don't think the person to complain about your job to is me. I haven't worked in 8 months. I like to and want to work and can't seem to find a job. How about I call your boss & express your feelings then offer myself for the position? Would you like that? This is the same person who complains about their partner. Apparently life could have been done better if they didn't get married. Really? If you're so unhappy, get divorced. It's easy nowadays. I know. It's exhausting to hear how someone is useless, incapable and dumb. Weren't you aware of any of this before you got married? If you weren't give that person an Oscar for their amazing acting performance & convincing you to marry them. It takes two to tango. If you completely enable a person to the point where you have to do everything because they don't do it and know you will, you don't get the right to complain. Frankly, I should be bitter about marriage but I'm not. Mine didn't work out because we were not the right people for each other and we had to do some growing up. I look forward to getting married again. I honestly like the idea of having someone to come home to (when I have a job) to talk about my day with over dinner. I like having someone with me at night and in the morning. I wish I knew then what I know now. I would have done things a lot different, like not get married or be in that toxic relationship. People have "discussions" because they don't always agree about everything. It's ok to have separate interests & separate things to do but also to have things to do together. It's good to have responsibilities to be held accountable for. No one should feel like they are being held back. People that are in relationships, married or not need to grow in the same direction. If that doesn't happen then someone is going to get left behind. These things were lacking in my marriage, but the next time, I know I can and will do it better. I know what I want now. I guess what I'm saying is I'm the wrong person to complain to. If you can't fix what's fucked up about your relationship, or you can't find some joy about doing your job then I don't want to hear it. Those are your faults and I will not be validating them. Sorry. You really need to make the best of your life, now. Live in the moments, be thankful for everything, even if it doesn't seem important. Don't wallow in the past about how you could have done things different. Can't change it now. Don't let something or someone special pass you by. Enjoy every moment. I effing hate NJ today for making me grow up and realizing I can be a better person. Blah. Eff it all.

Purpose

I've been awake since 3am. It's now 10am. I don't sleep much. How do you think I catch all the Sleep Talking Jay tidbits? I'm one of those people who doesn't have any trouble falling asleep, I can't stay asleep. I can't shut my brain off.

I rethink/over think/pre-think everything and anything on top of worrying about anything & everything. I think about how I should have handled something. I think about things that bother me or have hurt me. I think about how things should be, well how I would like things to be anyway. Needless to say, with being unemployed, I don't get a lot of sleep. That's why I've been up for 7 hours already. Anyway.....

I'm loving the Career Center. I've met a lot of nice people, including Windy. He's grown on me. We all seem to help each other learn. I especially like Dorothy, the teacher, a lot. She's just wonderful. I've noticed a few things about the Career Center though.

There isn't enough of Dorothy to go around. There are some student helpers in the class but it's still not enough. There are a couple of people learning to read, write & speak English. Dorothy is helping others get ready for the GED exam. Then there are people learning computer type "stuff". It's as basic as learning to use a computer because some people don't even know how to do that to people like me who are brushing up on regularly used programs & learning new programs. But I also noticed something else yesterday....

I sat next to a woman who usually sits a couple of computers away from me. We have assigned work stations, because folders are set up for us. I'm not going to mention her name just because it isn't necessary. As we were talking, mostly her, I realized that her self confidence is non-existent. I know how it feels to lose a job. I know what it's like to feel worthless. The difference, and it maybe it has to do with being younger, but I know it will get better. Yes, I have had my "funks" and I still do. But I haven't let it beat me down. In talking, I believe that is what happened to her. I believe that is what has happened & still happening with people who have lost their jobs. So instead of working on my program, I spent the time helping her....and talking.

I showed her how to log on to a website & search for a job. I helped her apply for a job by helping her write a cover letter, explaining that her email doubled as a cover letter. I showed her how to use her flash drive. I showed her how to organize her email better. She asked me to teach her how to text, her kids don't want her to know how, but she feels she should so I helped her with that. All the while we talked. She kept telling me she feels so lost & confused. I know that has to do with her confidence level. I told her that no matter what, she's not going to ruin anything, sometimes mistakes happen, but everything is fixable. She just has to try. To keep trying and to never stop trying.

She was in really good spirits when she left for the day. Pat (Windy) told me it was really nice that I helped her. Ironically, 2 days before that, I was helping him with PowerPoint & he said he learned more in the time with me than he did on his own. When I was done with what I was doing I asked Dorothy if I could talk with her for a few moments.

Possibly a little ballsy on my part, but I wanted to talk with Dorothy about the Career Center and if they had anything in place to help with self confidence & basic skills in preparation of applying/getting jobs. Let me digress for a moment......

I figured out a long time my purpose on this earth is to help people. I just haven't know in what capacity. It's now starting to present itself to me. I knew way back, when I worked in the group home my purpose. As staff, we each were a Primary Mentor to one kid in the group home. The first one I had felt she was entitled to have me buy things for her & she'd be nice to me. Guess what? That didn't work out so well. She eventually ran away & I was assigned a new girl. We did fun things together but we also did important stuff too. I would take her to get applications for jobs & help her fill them out & helped her follow up on them. We would have important talks. She was preparing to go back home to live with her mom, but she didn't get along with her step dad. I told her to have a talk with him about finding some peaceful agreement, that they both loved her mom. They talked and when she went home, everything was working out great.

I've always thought about how well she did. It also occurred to me that there are things not learned in any school. Nothing in place to help confidence and self esteem. So that's what I talked with Dorothy about. I have some ideas and I shared them with her. Do you know what she told me? She told me to write out how things could be presented & discussed in a tactful way!!! Me!!! I'm rather excited! This will be good for me for a lot of reasons.

Now, I'm off to start writing out all of my ideas and suggestions!!! Stay tuned!!!!

:)

Conversations at Wits End

So in the last week, I had 2 odd conversations. One was with my maintenance guy, who is nice, & one was with the cable guy, who was weird.

Last week I was doing laundry in the laundry room here at Wits End. I actually had my hair down, usually it's pulled into a ponytail because I typically do laundry after I go to the gym. I had actually showered because I was running errands as well. Anyway, he walked into the laundry room & this is how it went down:


MG(Maintenance Guy): Hi, did you do something different to your hair?
Me: I had it colored darker than what it was, it's a bit dark, I'm hoping it will fade.
MG: Oh, yeah, it is dark, I'd ask you if you're going for the Goth look, but your hair isn't straight & hanging in your face.
Me: Uh, no that isn't a look I'm trying to work.
MG: Good.

Nice. Mind you, I saw him 2 days before because he was in my apartment putting new thermostats in & my hair was done then.

Next one!!

I switched to a bundle pack in my cable, so I could save money, so they came to install my new phone. I was at the mercy of the cable company as I had to sit here between 8:30am & 12:30pm. I had tentative plans on seeing a friend, should the cable guy be there first thing, so I showered, got dressed (I put a real bra & jeans on) & I put makeup on.

Another thing you should know. I was paranoid. I watch way too many crime shows: Criminal Minds, CSI, Law & Order, America's Most Wanted, you name it. I just watched an episode of CSI where a pest guy raped a girl. Jay said I don't have to worry, I'm not a small girl & no one would bother me. I begged to differ because should a perpetrator have a firearm, I would be no match to that. Jay reminded me I had a 6lb weight bar I could swing, but I told him it wouldn't go well when I asked if I could go get my weight bar to defend myself.

Anyway, I was worried that my heart was going to be carved out of my chest. The perils of living alone. So here is this random & odd conversation:


CG(Cable Guy): I'm your neighbor, I live on Overlook.
Me: You rent from Carlton Village? (I was also wondering if he lives so close, why wasn't he here first thing.)
CG: Yes. Do you live alone?
Me: Yes.
CG: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: Yes.
CG: Are you engaged?
Me: No.
CG: Are you going to get married?
Me: No.
CG: Is he going to ask you to marry him?
Me: No.
CG: Why not?
Me: Because he doesn't want to marry anyone.
CG: Oh, that's too bad. Do you have kids?
Me: No.
CG: How old are you?
Me: I'm going to be 35.
CG: For real?? I thought you were only 24!
Me: No, I'm older than I look, thanks.
CG: Is that your real eye color or are those contacts?
Me: It's my real eye color.
CG: Oh, it's nice.
Me: Thank you.
CG: Ok, this is how you set up your new phone.......

He found his professionalism then. Mind you, when this conversation was taking place, my heart was racing & all I could think was "This is it, my heart is going to be cut right out of my chest".

When he left I never ran down my stairs so fast to lock & put the chain on the door. There is an outer door that you can only get in with a key but still.....

And that would conclude some conversations held at Wits End.

:)