Nun Ship

I'm not sure many people even know this story. It's a pretty old one. I don't know why it popped into my head either. It's pretty funny.

Years ago, when I had my first apartment in NJ, my downstairs neighbor was getting married. We had become friends & had been hanging out. Her maid of honor was planning a girl's night out. I offered to be the designated driver that night.

So we get out to a local place near us & her friend starts chatting it up with some guys. She was looking for some "company". I was there purely to be entertained.

So as we are sitting there chatting, this drunk guy named Bill came up to me & asked why I wasn't drinking. I told him I was the designated driver & not drinking. He asked me what kind of person does that so I told him a person who was going into the Nun Ship doesn't drink & drive & that we were trying something new out. I told him there was a new program with the Nun Ship where we come out in civilian clothes, being designated drivers for women so they get home safe & sound. Before any one corrects me, yes, I know nuns go into convents. That's pretty funny you know. And I did make all this up as it was happening. I'm good like that!!

He told me with how I looked I didn't belong with the nuns. Apparently nuns aren't well endowed. Then he asked me why I had an engagement ring on. I told him that it stood for my impending marriage to God. He was believing every single word I said. So as the night went on he kept asking if I really wanted to commit my life to God, looking the way I did.

The funny part was this guy had a friend who was sober. He was a really nice guy & he totally knew I was bullshitting his friend. He laughed every time I made something up. He & I laughed pretty hard when it was time to go.

THAT my friends is a 100% true & authentic Elizabeth story. Take me with you to a bar one night, I will show you, in person how it's done!!!

:)